No, I’m Not Grateful For My Trauma

How many times have you been asked, “Aren’t you grateful for your trauma because it’s made you into who you are?”

For me, it’s been too many times to count. There were even times I would go so far as to say, that even if given the chance I wouldn’t go back and change anything because the trauma made me into who I was. It was as if I believed my trauma had somehow made me stronger. 

Reality Check! YOU make YOU Stronger! 

You’re the one who pushed yourself day in and day out to keep going. 

You’re the one who went to countless therapy appointments. 

You’re the one who took your meds daily. 

You’re the one who helped get yourself to tomorrow. 

You’re the one that did the work through your entire healing journey. 

That wasn’t your trauma, IT WAS YOU! 

Somehow people have come to the belief that Trauma somehow makes you stronger, but if that were true the world would be a much different place. Your trauma is only what YOU make of it. 

Too many times we give our trauma more power than it deserves, while at the same time minimizing our own role in our recovery. Trauma pushes us down, but we’re the ones that pick ourselves back up and take back the power that the trauma stole from us. 

So be proud of yourself for your healing. That all came from YOU. 

Go buy yourself a gift, get a manicure, or just fucking pamper yourself. YOU DESERVE IT!

Now what about changing the past if we could? 

Am I thankful that my experiences and healing journey have led me to become a Trauma Recovery Coach and that I get to help people in their recovery journey? 

Of course I am, but that doesn’t mean I’m thankful for my trauma itself or that I would pass up the opportunity to save myself from the trauma all together. It may have played a role in my journey getting to where I am today but that doesn’t mean I would say no to the opportunity to save myself from countless sleepless nights, days full of tears, years of agonizing shame, hurt, and fear, and crippling anxiety. 

So many times, we think we need to be grateful for our trauma in order to move forward, but that’s not the case. You can accept your trauma without being grateful for it and still take back the power it stole from you! 

Remember, YOU are what YOU make of your trauma!